My Boyfriend and I Don’t Have Anything to Talk About

You’re sitting with your boyfriend, both scrolling through your phones because you’ve run out of things to say to each other.

You love each other so much, but that doesn’t mean you won’t experience a few minutes of “Silence of the Lambs”-level awkwardness while trying to figure out what to talk about.

You already know his day was okay. You both had oatmeal for lunch. You’ve seen the breakfast taco pictures he’s been sending you every five minutes.

Damn, do we even have anything to talk about anymore?

The truth is, no one escapes this. Maybe not every couple, but almost every couple. One of the easiest things to take for granted in a relationship is communication.

When you first start dating, everything is new and shiny, so you naturally want to know every little detail about each other. But as time goes on, you don’t have to work as hard at it.

The bad news? Comfort is easy. Curiosity and effort take a little more work.

The good news? You can learn to talk again, even if things feel a bit dry. It just takes some curiosity, effort, and creativity.

So here’s a list of funny, deep, serious, and not-so-serious things you can talk about with your boyfriend the next time you feel like you’re at a loss.

What to talk about in a relationship

1. Talk About Your Day — But on a Deeper Level

Let’s be honest, you both probably ask each other every day, “How was your day?” But how often do you really listen to the answer? Do you fall into the same tired “It was fine” routine and just let it slide? Instead, try diving deeper into each other’s day.

Ask questions like:

“What was the most interesting thing that happened to you today?”
“Did anything annoy you?”
“What was the funniest thing that happened to you today?”

Questions like these will get you what you really want — details. Instead of one-word answers, you’ll hear stories. You’ll get a better glimpse of what’s really going on with each other, beyond just the surface level.

2. Reminisce About How You Met

There’s something really cute and intimate about nostalgia. Talk about the first time you met — how you felt, what you thought of each other, and what stood out to you most. Ask him what it was about you that caught his attention or if there was a moment when he realized he wanted to be with you.

These conversations are sweet and grounding. They bring you both back to the beginning and remind you how far you’ve come.

3. Talk About Childhood Memories

We all have those hilarious, cringeworthy, sweet, or weird stories from our childhood. Ask each other things like:

“What was your favorite TV show or cartoon when you were little?”
“What did you get in trouble for as a kid?”
“Who was your childhood best friend?”

You’ll both learn new things about each other — and probably laugh a lot too. Childhood stories are a great way to tap into that playful energy relationships sometimes lose over time.

4. Talk About Your Dreams and Future Goals

We often forget to talk about our individual dreams, not just relationship goals. It’s important to discuss things like:

Career ambitions
Places you want to travel together
The kind of home you’d like to have one day
What you’d do if you both won a million dollars

By having these kinds of conversations, you’re focusing on the future. It shows that you’re both invested in building a life together — not just living in the present.

5. Ask Each Other Deep Questions

When you can’t think of anything to say, dig deeper. Ask each other questions that require more than surface-level answers, like:

“What’s one secret you’ve never told anyone?”
“What’s the scariest thing that’s ever happened to you?”
“What’s the nicest thing someone’s ever said to you?”
“What do you need from me to feel loved and supported?”
“What would you change about your past if you could?”

Deep questions build emotional intimacy. By sharing parts of yourself that not everyone gets to see, you’re building trust and strengthening your bond.

6. Talk About Things You’re Both Interested In

Another way to keep conversations flowing is by talking about topics you both enjoy. It could be anything — sports, movies, music, food, travel, fashion — you name it. Even if your interests don’t completely overlap, show curiosity.

If he loves gaming, ask what makes it fun for him. If you love cooking, tell him about a recipe you’d like to try together.

Sometimes, it’s not about having identical interests but showing genuine curiosity about what the other person loves.

7. Make Plans Together

Conversations don’t always have to be deep. Sometimes, planning something together is enough to spark connection. Talk about:

A date night or weekend getaway you’d like to plan
A mini bucket list of things to do together
A new restaurant or café to try
Movies or shows you want to binge-watch

Planning gives you both something to look forward to — and something fun to talk about in the meantime.

8. Talk About Random “What Ifs”

This one’s always fun and helps shake up the routine. Play a little “What if?” game:

“What if we could live anywhere in the world — where would you go?”
“What if we could switch bodies for a day?”
“What if we had to survive a zombie apocalypse — who would be the warrior and who would be the chef?”

It’s silly, but being imaginative together keeps things light and helps you laugh together.

9. Discuss the Little Things You Appreciate About Each Other

This one’s simple but powerful. When we get comfortable in relationships, we sometimes forget to express appreciation. Take a moment to tell your boyfriend what you love about him — and ask him to do the same.

It could be something small, like how he always walks you to your car, or something bigger, like how he supports you through tough times.

These conversations don’t just fill the silence — they deepen your emotional bond. It’s hard to feel distant when you’re constantly reminded that you’re loved and valued.

10. Talk About Your Relationship Itself

Okay, this one might sound awkward, but it’s actually really healthy. Instead of avoiding the elephant in the room, talk about it. You could say something like, “I feel like we haven’t had much to talk about lately. Do you feel the same way?”

Acknowledging the silence can open the door to more honest conversations. Maybe you’re both tired, stressed, or preoccupied with work or other responsibilities — and that’s okay. Relationships change over time, and communication has to change with them. Admitting it and being open about it shows maturity.

11. Talk About Personal Growth

Ask each other about how you’ve changed and how you’d like to keep growing.

“What’s something you’ve learned about yourself this year?”
“What’s one habit you’d like to build or break?”
“How can we help each other grow?”

These conversations turn your relationship into a source of motivation and support — not just romance.

12. Play Conversation Games

If things still feel awkward, use prompts or games to help you open up. There are tons of conversation card decks and apps for couples, like We’re Not Really Strangers or The And. You can also find question lists online, print them out, and take turns asking each other.

Sometimes, you just need a little help to loosen things up again.

13. Talk About Funny or Embarrassing Stories

This one’s a no-brainer. Laughter is key in any relationship. Share funny, embarrassing, or awkward stories — whether from school, work, or just last week.

These conversations remind you both not to take life (or each other) too seriously.

14. Discuss Your “Firsts”

Revisit your firsts together — your first date, first kiss, first argument, first trip, and so on. Talk about how you both felt then and how you feel now.

Nostalgia is powerful. It reminds you of where you started and helps rekindle the spark that brought you together.

15. Be Okay With Comfortable Silence

Lastly, remember that silence isn’t always a bad thing. If you’re both truly comfortable, silence can be peaceful. You don’t have to fill every moment with words. Sometimes, the best connection happens when you’re simply being together — watching a show, holding hands, or sharing quiet moments.

Comfort is part of love. Words are only one small part of it.

Final Thoughts

Not always having something to talk about with your boyfriend doesn’t mean something’s wrong. It simply means you’ve reached a level of comfort where curiosity has been replaced by routine — and that’s normal. The key is to not stay there.

Be intentional about reconnecting. Ask meaningful questions. Try new things together. But most importantly, listen — really listen — when he opens up.

Relationships, like conversations, flow best when both people are engaged, curious, and open.

So, the next time you sit down with your boyfriend and that awkward silence starts to creep in, remember — there’s always something to talk about. You just have to take that first step.

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ONWE DAMIAN

Onwe Damian Chukwuemeka is a relationship and self-improvement coach, as well as a final-year law student at the University of Calabar, Nigeria. He has distinguished himself in leadership and service, and has held key positions such as Deputy Director of Public Prosecution in the Students’ Union Government and Justice of the Malabor High Court, University of Calabar, Nigeria. Learn more about him

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