Marriage is hard. It’s something no one really tells you about once you’ve decided to take the plunge. People only show you the “honeymoon phase” — where everything is rainbows and butterflies.
There are days when you wake up and think, “Wow, I’m so lucky to be with this person.” Then there are days when your relationship feels further from the ground than the space station. All relationships have dips and plateaus, but sometimes those dips start feeling like your new normal.
The silence, the tension, the arguments — all of it slowly begins to turn your marriage into something that looks “broken.” If you’ve ever wondered whether your marriage can be saved, or if it’s even worth salvaging, keep reading.
Believe it or not, many marriages that look broken are often, in fact, very fixable. That’s a truth most people don’t fully grasp. Just because two people are fighting all the time or one person seems to be checking out doesn’t mean the marriage is over. In most cases, what’s missing is effort, willingness to communicate, and just a bit of understanding.
If both you and your spouse are willing to commit to that, then you can breathe a sigh of relief — it’s a fixable situation.
10 Signs Your Marriage Could Be Saved
1. You Both Still Care About Each Other’s Feelings
It may seem counterintuitive when every bone in your body is screaming, “I don’t care!” but if either you or your spouse still cares about the other’s feelings, then there’s hope.
Does your heart sink when your spouse is upset? Do you apologize after an argument? Does your spouse check on you after a disagreement? All of these are signs that love is still present.
You may not like each other much right now, but that doesn’t mean the love is gone. Often, it’s guilt that tells us we still care. One thing I’ve learned over the years is that when someone truly stops caring, it’s a clear sign the relationship has reached its end.
Related: 10 Signs Your Husband Is Slowly Giving Up on Your Marriage
2. You Both Want to Fix Things
One of the strongest signs that a marriage can be saved is when both people are willing to try. If one person says, “I want us to work,” that’s a good sign. But if both people are saying it — even in different ways — then the marriage can absolutely be restored.
You don’t need to have all the answers right now. You just need to want to find them.
Related: If You Want Peace in Your Marriage, Avoid These 10 Things
3. The Good Memories Still Matter to You
Look back and think about the good times you’ve had with your spouse. Remember your wedding day? Your first date? The first time you laughed so hard you cried?
If those memories still make you smile — if you can still remember why you fell in love and want to feel that way again — that’s a sign your marriage can be saved.
Couples who have truly reached the point of no return don’t look back on the good times with warmth. They feel nothing. So if you can still recall those moments with fondness, your relationship still has life in it.
Related: 7 Signs You’re Being Too Demanding in Your Marriage
4. You Still Communicate — Even If It’s Awful
I can’t tell you how many couples have come to me asking if their marriage can be saved, and then said, “We just don’t talk anymore. We fight, and it’s awful, so we stopped fighting.”
Wrong. That’s worse.
Silence is the true enemy. Talking — even if it’s heated — is still communication. It shows engagement. You fight, you make up, you grow. What you shouldn’t do is shut down and refuse to talk altogether.
Related: 13 Biggest Lies Everyone Believes About Marriage
5. You Still Feel Attraction or Affection
This one is huge. If either of you still feels a spark — if you still look at each other and feel butterflies or catch your breath — your marriage can be saved.
Even the smallest gestures count: a hand on the shoulder, holding hands, a shared bedtime routine. These small moments of affection mean there’s still connection between you.
Related: 15 Signs You’re In A Loveless Marriage
6. You Can Still Laugh Together
Humor is one of the most underrated relationship savers. If you and your spouse can still laugh together — even occasionally — it’s a strong sign that your marriage can be saved.
You might not feel like laughing right now, but if the smallest thought or memory can make both of you chuckle, that’s a good sign. The ability to share laughter, even during tough times, is a beautiful reminder of your bond.
7. You Share the Same Values
Love might make the world go round, but shared values keep a marriage steady.
You don’t have to agree on everything, but if you both hold the same core values — honesty, family, faith, loyalty, or growth — you have a foundation to build on. Differences in habits or opinions can be worked out. Differences in values are harder to fix, but if you still align on the important things, your marriage has a fighting chance.
8. You Can Picture a Future Together
This is the big one — the elephant in the room.
If you can picture yourself with your spouse in the future — five, ten, or even fifteen years from now — and the thought brings a smile to your face, your marriage can be saved.
But if thinking about your future together fills you with dread or emptiness, it may be time to reconsider. The ability to envision a shared future is one of the clearest indicators that hope still exists.
9. You’re Willing to Seek Help
Many people wish they’d reached this step sooner.
When you ask, “Can my marriage be saved?” nine times out of ten, the answer is yes. The hard part is accepting that you might not be able to fix it alone.
We all want to be self-sufficient, but sometimes saving your marriage means letting go of control. If one of you has mentioned seeing a therapist, going to counseling, or even talking to a trusted pastor or mentor, that’s a win.
Seeking help shows humility and courage — and your marriage will thank you for it.
10. You Still See the Good in Each Other
If your marriage is at the point where you can no longer see any good in your partner, then, my dear, it may be time to move on.
However, if you can still recognize even small positives — their patience, their sense of humor, their effort — and say thank you for those things, your marriage still has hope.
Humans are wired to notice flaws first, but gratitude can shift everything. Seeing and acknowledging the good is a sign that love is still alive somewhere beneath the frustration.
How to Start Rebuilding
Now that you know your marriage can be saved, where do you begin? Like anything else in life, you start small.
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Acknowledge where you are. Say how you feel, not how they make you feel. Use “I feel…” instead of “You make me feel…”
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Show affection. Give them a hug or express your love in their preferred love language.
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Take care of yourself. Shower, rest, eat something comforting (even a cookie helps!).
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Learn to communicate. Listen to understand, not to reply.
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Spend intentional time together. Reconnect through shared activities.
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Be patient. Healing takes time — don’t expect overnight change.
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Forgive — and allow yourself to be forgiven.
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Take a deep breath. Don’t overcomplicate things.
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Start small. Tackle minor issues first, then move on to the bigger ones.
Healing your marriage is hard — I won’t sugarcoat it. It takes consistent effort from both partners. But there are some things in life too valuable to give up on easily.
If you can look at your partner and say, “I want to save this marriage,” then there is hope.
Final Thoughts
The fact that you’re reading this means you care — you care enough to want to fix things and make it work. You might not know where to start, and that’s okay.
Marriage isn’t linear. It’s not a sprint — it’s a marathon filled with twists and turns only you and your partner truly understand. There will be good days and bad days, moments of doubt and moments of deep connection.
If you’re sitting here trying to figure out whether your marriage can be saved, then that’s already a great place to start. Because caring enough to ask the question means you still believe there’s something worth saving.
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