Relationship conflicts are inevitable. Fighting in a relationship may be a normal experience to some couples, but if it happens consistently, it is a sign of an unhealthy relationship. Here’s what you should do to stop fighting in your relationship.
Relationship fights occur as a result of many factors like constant argument, confrontation, and the inability to compromise. For any couple to live in peace and harmony, one person must be willing to compromise on certain things. For example, you must not try to win every argument you have with your significant other, as this can trigger a fight if the issue is not addressed as soon as possible.
Is it normal to fight a lot in a relationship?
It is normal to experience conflict in your relationship. But fighting consistently with your partner is not a sign of a healthy relationship. If you are not yet married to each other, it is a red flag you shouldn’t overlook. But if you are already living together as a couple, adopting good communication skills can help you resolve the problem.
Couples fight in their relationships. But it shouldn’t be an everyday routine. If you are already in a relationship where you always fight with your boyfriend, girlfriend, wife, or your husband, then this post is for you. Here’s what to do to end fighting with your partner.
What does fighting do to a relationship?
Fighting helps you to know more about your partner. For example, what they want in the relationship, and their deal-breakers. But it can also destroy your relationship if you don’t apply the necessary skills needed to resolve those issues before they escalate.
Read also, what men want in a relationship, and what women want in a relationship.
How to stop fighting in a relationship
1. Avoid what triggers the fight
Either you or your partner may be the reason why you always fight. To avert this, you must avoid doing or saying those things that triggers the fight. So, the first thing you should do is to figure out what you are fighting for. Conflicts don’t just arise in a relationship. Something must precipitate it. And once you have discovered the root of the problem, you avoid it at all cost.
2. Learn to compromise on certain things
Compromise is needed to maintain peace and unity in a relationship. In any relationship where couples cannot agree with each other on certain things, there will always be crisis between them. So, to avoid fighting in your relationship, you must be willing to compromise.
To compromise is to:
- Make sacrifices
- Agree on certain things just for peace to reign in your relationship, and
- Deny yourself some pleasures just to satisfy your partner.
All these will help to eliminate the constant fight between you and your significant other.
3. Avoid confrontation
Conflict avoidance is a person’s method of reacting to conflict, which attempts to avoid directly confronting the issue at hand.
You should avoid confrontation if you discovered that your partner always gets mad each time you challenge him or her. This can trigger a fight between the both of you, especially if they are hot-tempered. Instead, try to raise the issue again when you realize that your partner is in a happy mood to listen to you.
4. Distance yourself whenever you are angry
Having a severe argument can get you upset. And anger damages a lot of things. What you should do instead is to walk away each time you get mad at your partner. This will help you to avoid losing your temper on him or her, and save yourself the stress of fighting.
Read also: How to be happy in a relationship.
5. Use good communication skills to resolve conflicts when they arise
There is power in communication. Adopting good communication skills is another thing that will help you stop fighting with your partner. Good communication helps you address those issues affecting your relationship and find a solution to them.
Healthy communication can help you end the fight you always have with your partner if you can adopt a good listening skill, and be ready to apologize if you are the person at fault.
No need of trying to vindicate yourself while you know you are wrong. Be humble enough to say “I’m sorry” because pride kills a relationship.
Read also: How to apologize to someone
6. Ensure you set good boundaries for the relationship
Good boundaries are a must for a healthy relationship. Every relationship without a healthy boundary is like a nation without the rule of law. Boundaries serve as checks and balances in a relationship. Therefore, it is the constitution guiding every relationship.
If you don’t have any boundaries guiding you yet, then you should consider setting one.
How do you fix a relationship after a constant fight?
Below is how to heal your relationship after a fight.
1. Give each other some space after the fight
Trying to resolve a fight or an argument when you are both emotionally hot is risky. It can cause further damages and even trigger a second fight. All you should do instead is to give your partner some space to heal emotionally. Give each other a breathing room to reflect on what happened. By doing this you have created a peaceful atmosphere for conflict resolution.
2. Discuss the issue once and for all
Do not try to hold your feelings to yourself. You are permitted to get angry, but do not allow your anger to destroy your relationship.
When you have both cooled down, the next thing you should do is to discuss the matter. Do not hold grudges against your partner. Create an avenue for him or her to express how they feel. And instead of trying to lay all the blames on them, simply apologize and let love and peace reign.
3. If you can’t stop fighting, then consider couples counseling
You may have tried all your best to stop quarreling and fighting with your partner but to no avail. I advise you visit an expert for counseling.
Visiting a therapist can help you understand each other’s thoughts and feelings. But do not forget that healing your relationship after an argument requires patience, time, and persistence.
Have you had a fight in your relationship before? How did you resolve it? Share your advice with us in the comment section, below.