21 Silent Relationship Killers To Watch Out For
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21 Silent Relationship Killers To Watch Out For

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It’s no secret that relationships can be tough, but what some people don’t know is that some behaviors can slowly but surely kill relationships even before they get a chance to take off. Understanding these relationship killers and how to prevent them can mean the difference between a successful and unsuccessful relationship.

In this post, I will provide key insights and advice on how to identify and prevent these silent killers of a relationship, so you can keep your relationships healthy, joyful, and long-lasting.

No two relationships are the same, but there are some universally accepted relationship killers that can lead to a break-up no matter who is involved.

Relationship experts agree that trust, communication, and self-awareness are essential ingredients to keeping a relationship strong and healthy, but when these key elements are missing, there is a good chance your relationship will be headed for trouble.

What are relationship killers?

Relationship killers are those things that can put an end to a relationship. They can range widely from small communication issues to major irreconcilable differences. Everyone has a different idea of what relationship killers are, and they can change through the years.

Emotional and physical intimacy can be affected if partners don’t discuss what they define as relationship killers. To maintain a healthy relationship, couples need to recognize when a situation could become a relationship killer, and learn how to effectively address it. Not every problem is resolvable, but recognizing it and having the courage to discuss it can lead to a deeper understanding and a stronger connection.

21 Silent Relationship killers to watch out for

If you are wondering what kills a relationship most, here are the twenty-one biggest and commonest things that destroy relationships.

1. External influence

Allowing a third party to involve in everything that happens in your relationship is a major relationship killer you should watch out for.

In most couples, either the man or the woman involves their family or friends each time a misunderstanding erodes between them and their partner. This action has destroyed a lot of relationships.

It’s important to communicate openly and honestly with your partner, so involving others in your relationship should be a joint decision.

Involving others not only distracts from the real issue at hand but can also cause further misunderstandings or mistrust. This can be especially damaging if your partner does not feel comfortable discussing the issue with their family or friends.

2. Nagging attitude

A nagging attitude is another killer of relationships you should watch out for. Nobody likes a nagging partner. If you are the type that always complains and wants everything to be done now, then your relationship will definitely fall apart.

3. Unforgiveness

Most relationships fail not because the couple does not love each other but because one person finds it difficult to let go of wrongs. No matter how much you strive to keep a relationship, love cannot stand where there is unforgiveness.

When someone harbors resentment and anger, it’s like cancer that prevents love from growing and developing.

Small resentments can add up over time and lead to a breakup, so it’s important to deal with any wrongs and issues before they snowball into something bigger. Finding a way to forgive and let go of past grievances is key to making a relationship last.

4. Suspicion

Suspicion emanates from jealousy and this is another thing that kills relationships. Insecurity will make you think and believe what does not exist. For example, jealousy can make you think your partner just slept with someone before coming back from work. It can make you think your partner is having affairs and when this suspicion continues, it can bring an end to a relationship.

Being suspicious brings a lack of trust in a relationship. And no relationship can continue if the two parties do not trust each other anymore.

5. Avoiding conflicts

Running away from relationship problems isn’t going to solve your problems, rather it will create more problems for you and your partner. Instead of trying to avoid relationship conflicts, look for a way to resolve those issues.

6. Financial issues

Financial problem is one of the things that destroy relationship the most.

Arguments as to who will and how to spend money contribute to why most relationships collapse. So, never take any communication about your finances for granted.

7. Complacency

If people become complacent in a relationship, it can quickly lead to boredom and dissatisfaction. All relationships need a continual influx of new activities, conversations, and experiences to stay exciting and interesting.

8. Bad communication skills

Most couples communicate in their relationship but they lack good communication skills. Effective communication entails talking about what is relevant not only to you but to your partner also, and giving them the opportunity to also air their view.

Good communication skills entail listening not because you want to say something but to understand the message your partner is trying to convey.

9. Comparisons

Comparing your partner and your relationship with others is another silent killer of a relationship. This attitude will not only make you feel unsatisfied with your relationship but will prompt you to seek other ways to fulfill your needs.

10 Micro cheating

Some behaviors like flirting with other women or men are considered micro-cheating, and this lifestyle can destroy your relationship.

The worst part of micro-cheating is that, usually, it’s done without your partner being aware of it, which can be one of the most damaging and heart-breaking outcomes.

It’s important to be aware of your behavior and activities that could be considered micro-cheating and avoid them at all costs; if you are tempted to act on these impulses, consider the potential consequences on the bond between you and your partner.

Think of the potential negative impact on your relationship, and remind yourself of the trust and loyalty that you have promised each other.

Related: Signs your boyfriend will cheat again

11. One-Sided Expectations

When entering into any relationship, it’s important to set expectations on both sides. Both parties should be aware of what’s expected, what the terms of the deal are, and how each person can benefit from participating in the relationship.

12. Breaking Promises

Trust is the foundation of any relationship. If you make a promise, it’s important to keep it. If you can’t, be sure to explain why and make sure to discuss how you are going to make up for it.

Not fulfilling your promises to your partner is another thing that kills most relationships because no one wants to date an unfaithful partner.

13. Not paying attention to your partner

Listening is key to understanding the other person’s perspective and needs. No matter the situation, it’s important to listen to the other person and take the time to understand what they are trying to say before making a decision.

14. Not being honest

Most couples try to outsmart their partner by telling lies but this type of smartness only brings an end to a relationship, especially when the other person discovers you are constantly lying to them.

15. Disrespect

Being disrespectful to your partner is one thing no one condones in a relationship.

It’s important to treat everyone with respect and dignity. No matter the situation, it’s important to remember to show respect and gratitude for the other person and the effort they are putting into the relationship.

16. Pride

Another relationship killer you should be aware of is ego. Pride kills a relationship.

Ego can sometimes cause a domineering attitude, which means one partner tries to control the other to the point where individuality is lost. This creates an imbalance in the relationship, where one partner feels superior and the other feels less worthy.

This situation can happen when one partner has more power or influence over the other. The saddest thing is when partners strive to outdo each other instead of measuring success through collaboration and support.

To have a healthy relationship, both parties need to be respectful, cherish each other’s personal achievements, and find joy in their individual successes.

17. Familiarity

Being too familiar with your partner has contributed to why most couples take themselves for granted.

When we become blasé about our relationship and our partner, we start to forget about the little details that made us fall in love in the first place. We start to take for granted the way our partner makes us feel, the little things they do for us, and the memories we share together.

It’s important to keep the spark alive and make sure to appreciate our partner and stay in tune with the details that make us unique as a couple. Taking the time to show we care and to regularly inject appreciation into our relationship helps to make it even stronger.

18. Trying to Change Your Partner

No matter how hard you try to change your partner, he or she will always remain who they are. It is important to accept them for who they are and not to try and change them into the person you want them to be.

19. Taking decisions alone

No matter how much you love each other, if your partner is often left behind when it comes to taking decisions, he or she will never feel happy and this can result in a breakup, especially if they have complained about it for some time but you’ve refused to change.

20. Lack of appreciation

Feeling unappreciated is another relationship destroyer you should take note of. Everyone needs to feel appreciated. When we don’t get recognition for our efforts it can leave us feeling unimportant and unloved, and this can tear our relationship apart.

21. Silence

Silence is one of the things that kills most relationships. No matter how aggrieved you or your partner is, never choose silence as the best thing to do.

Rather than letting your emotions get the best of you and result in silence, it is important to pause and take time to think before responding. It is equally important to ensure that your response is mindful and considerate. Listening to your partner is essential, especially if they are expressing hurt or anguish.


In conclusion, if you want to nurture a healthy and fulfilling relationship, it’s essential to acknowledge the above-mentioned relationship killers and deal with them if you eventually figure out any in your relationship.

No two relationships are the same, but consciously creating an environment that is conducive can ensure your relationship is strong and stable in the long term.

As the French writer Antoine de Saint-Exupéry put it: “Love does not consist in gazing at each other, but in looking outward together in the same direction.”

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