22 Signs He's Hurting After The Breakup

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Breakups are never easy to deal with, and they can leave both parties emotionally and physically drained. If you’re wondering whether your ex-partner is hurting after the breakup, it can be challenging to determine, especially if he’s trying to act like everything is fine. In this article, we’ll explore 22 signs he is hurting after the breakup and provide you with some helpful insights into male behavior during this difficult time.

It’s common for men to hide their emotions, especially when it comes to breakups. Society often teaches them to be strong and not show their vulnerability.

However, this doesn’t mean they don’t feel the pain and heartache that comes with ending a relationship. In fact, men can be just as hurt as women, even if they don’t express it openly.

So, how can you tell if your ex is hurting after the breakup? Keep reading to discover the signs and what you can do about it.

Signs he’s hurting after the breakup

1. He Keeps in Touch

One of the most apparent signs he is hurting after the breakup is if he continues to stay in touch with you. If he’s frequently texting, calling, or messaging you on social media, it’s a clear indication that he’s finding it hard to let go. This constant communication shows that he’s still thinking about you and may not have accepted the end of the relationship.

2. He Says He Misses You

When a man admits to missing you after a breakup, it’s a strong sign that he’s hurting. Saying “I miss you” can be a difficult thing for many men, as it requires vulnerability and honesty. If your ex is telling you he misses you, it’s likely that he’s been thinking about you a lot and is struggling with the separation.

3. He’s in Denial About the Breakup

Some men have a hard time accepting the end of a relationship and may act as if nothing has changed, even after you’ve broken up. If your ex is still behaving like you’re together, it’s a sign that he’s in denial about the breakup and is hurting as a result. He may be hoping that you’ll change your mind and give the relationship another chance.

4. He Jumps Into a New Relationship

If your ex quickly enters a new relationship after your breakup, it could be a sign that he’s trying to mask his pain. Starting a new relationship soon after a breakup is often a way for people to distract themselves from the hurt and avoid facing their emotions. This rebound relationship may not last long, as it’s more about filling a void than finding true love.

Related: Signs your ex never loved you

5. He Cuts Off Communication

On the other hand, some men deal with their pain by cutting off all communication with their ex. If your former partner has blocked you on social media or refuses to answer your calls or texts, it may be because he’s hurting and trying to protect himself from further emotional distress.

6. He Avoids Social Gatherings

Another sign that your ex is hurting after the breakup is if he avoids social gatherings or events where he might run into you. This behavior indicates that he’s not ready to face you and is likely still processing the end of the relationship. It may also be a way for him to protect himself from any potential confrontations or awkward encounters.

Related: How to make your ex jealous

7. He’s Acting Out of Character

When people are hurting, they often exhibit changes in their behavior. If your ex is acting out of character, it could be a sign that he’s struggling with the breakup. This might include being more irritable, withdrawn, or engaging in self-destructive behaviors like excessive drinking or partying. Keep an eye out for any unusual behavior that suggests he’s not coping well with the separation.

8. He Stalks You on Social Media

If your ex is constantly checking your social media profiles or even creating fake accounts to keep tabs on you, it’s a clear indication that he’s hurting after the breakup. This obsessive behavior is a sign that he’s having difficulty moving on and is still invested in your life.

9. He Talks Negatively About You

Another sign that your ex is hurting after the breakup is if he starts badmouthing you to friends or family. This behavior might be an attempt to cope with the pain by shifting the blame onto you or trying to convince himself that the breakup was for the best. It’s important to remember that these negative comments are more about his emotional state than a reflection of your character.

10. He’s Overly Emotional

Men are often taught to suppress their emotions, but when they’re hurting, they may struggle to contain their feelings. If your ex is showing signs of being overly emotional, such as crying, getting angry easily, or being overly sentimental, it’s a strong indication that he’s struggling with the breakup.

11. He Keeps Bringing Up the Past

If your ex can’t seem to stop talking about your past together or reminiscing about the good times you shared, it’s a sign that he’s hurting after the breakup. This fixation on the past is often a way for people to cope with the pain of losing a relationship and can indicate that he’s not ready to let go.

12. He Tries to Make You Jealous

One of the more manipulative signs he is hurting after the breakup is if he deliberately tries to make you jealous. This behavior might include flaunting a new relationship or engaging in activities he knows will get under your skin. While it’s hurtful to witness, it’s important to recognize that this behavior is a sign of his emotional turmoil rather than a reflection of your worth.

Related: How to get back with your ex

13. He’s Struggling with His Routine

A breakup can throw a person’s life into disarray, making it difficult to maintain a sense of normalcy. If your ex seems to be struggling with his daily routine, such as having difficulty sleeping, eating, or focusing on work, it’s a sign that he’s hurting after the breakup.

14. He’s Seeking Closure

If your ex keeps reaching out to discuss the breakup or ask for closure, it’s an indication that he’s struggling to accept the end of the relationship. This behavior might include asking for an explanation, wanting to talk about what went wrong, or even requesting a second chance. It shows that he’s still emotionally invested in the relationship and is hurting as a result.

15. He’s Making Big Life Changes

When people are hurting after a breakup, they sometimes make significant life changes as a way of coping with the pain. If your ex has suddenly moved to a new city, changed jobs, or made other drastic changes in his life, it could be a sign that he’s hurting and trying to find a fresh start.

16. He’s Rebounding with Multiple Partners

Another sign that your ex is hurting after the breakup is if he starts dating multiple people without any real commitment or emotional connection. This behavior is often a way for people to distract themselves from the pain of the breakup and feel desired or wanted again. However, it’s important to recognize that this is a temporary coping mechanism and not a reflection of his true feelings.

17. He’s Closed Off Emotionally

If your ex seems to be emotionally closed off and unwilling to open up about his feelings, it’s a sign that he’s hurting after the breakup. Men often struggle to express their emotions, especially in the wake of a breakup, and may choose to keep their feelings bottled up rather than risk appearing vulnerable.

18. He’s Seeking Attention from Mutual Friends

If your ex is reaching out to your mutual friends to talk about the breakup or seek their advice, it’s a sign that he’s hurting and looking for support. This behavior might include discussing his feelings, asking for their opinion on what went wrong, or even trying to get information about you.

19. He’s Regressing to Old Habits

People often revert to old habits when they’re hurting, as a way of finding comfort and familiarity. If your ex has started engaging in behaviors he gave up during your relationship, such as smoking or excessive drinking, it’s a sign that he’s struggling with the breakup and trying to cope in unhealthy ways.

20. He Avoids You at All Costs

If your ex is going out of his way to avoid seeing you or being in the same place as you, it’s a sign that he’s hurting after the breakup. This avoidance behavior is often a way for people to protect themselves from additional emotional pain or awkward encounters.

21. He Takes a Long Time to Move On

If your ex takes an unusually long time to move on or start dating again, it’s a sign that he’s still hurting after the breakup. This prolonged period of emotional healing might indicate that he’s having difficulty letting go of the relationship and accepting the end.

22. Decrease in self-esteem

Breakups sometimes affects one’s self-worth. If you notice that your ex-boyfriend doesn’t seem to be himself anymore, especially when you stumple upon each other on the way, it’s a big sign he is deeply hurt by the breakup.

What to Do If He’s Hurting After the Breakup

Now that you can identify the signs he is hurting after the breakup, it’s important to consider what to do next. Start by asking yourself some questions:

Do I still have feelings for him?

Is he genuinely sorry for his actions?
Can I forgive him?
Is there a possibility of getting back together?

It’s crucial to remember that just because you’re both hurting doesn’t mean you should jump back into the relationship without careful consideration. Reflect on the reasons for the breakup and give each other time and space to heal. Over time, you’ll gain clarity on the best course of action for your situation.

Do guys hurt after they break up with a girl?

Yes, it is common for both men and women to experience emotional pain and hurt after a breakup. The intensity and duration of these feelings can vary depending on the individual and the circumstances surrounding the breakup.

How do you know if he’s still in love after a break up

Determining whether a guy still loves you after a breakup can be challenging, but there are a few signs to look for. If he maintains regular communication, expresses concern for your well-being, and shows genuine interest in your life, it could indicate lingering feelings. Additionally, if he seeks opportunities to spend time together, reminisces about the past, or exhibits jealousy when you mention other men, it may suggest that he still cares deeply.

Conclusion

Identifying the signs he is hurting after the breakup can help you better understand your ex’s emotional state and make informed decisions about your future together.

Remember that everyone copes with breakups differently and that it’s essential to give both yourself and your ex the time and space needed to heal. If you’re struggling with the complexities of a breakup, consider seeking the guidance of a relationship expert who can help you navigate these challenging emotions and make decisions that align with your life goals.

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ONWE DAMIAN

Onwe Damian Chukwuemeka is a relationship writer, lover of music and a lawyer. Read more